To be honest, I haven't written much of anything lately, and it's not for lack of time.
The source of this drought is somewhat unclear, but I think it stems from the fact that I feel a bit disillusioned with my own writing. Do I enjoy writing? Yes, of course. I'm just not sure I'm that great at it, at least no better than the thousands upon thousands of other word sprites out there. Beyond my insecurities, I'm just not so sure I know around which format my words should be molded. I'm afraid I have lost my voice.
I mean, let's be serious. My life really isn't THAT interesting and I can't help but feel a bit self-obsessed writing about it. I tried the more "creative writing" route, but that just takes a great deal more time and effort, something not necessarily appealing for someone with a lack of motivation (i.e. ME). Thus, the question emerges: How do I make my writing interesting to people OTHER THAN my mother? Or is this a question I should even be asking myself? Writing is, after all, a form of self-expression and thus anti-thetical to the idea of writing for a particular audience. On the other hand, I can't help but appreciate the viewpoint of an old friend of mine, himself a phenomenal writer, performer, and artist. His argument is thus: Art is a gift. It is not about the artist, but central to the recipient. A great actor does not act for himself but to entertain, to give the gift of theater. This same principle applies to the craft of writing. A writer does not write to show off his or her talents, or accumulate accolades and pats on the back. She writes to share a part of herself, whether it is to entertain, inform, or inspire. In the end, there is no artist, just the product itself, a small piece of a person, a time, an idea. And in that regard, art--specifically the written word-- is the ultimate act of selflessness.
Then why is it I feel like the most narcissistic person on this planet just writing this post...
2 comments:
You are awesome at writing! I know it can seem thankless and there's always the self-doubt... but if you have entertained or touched anyone it sure makes you feel good.
I've gone through alot of the same things with my photography (and granted, I also don't think I'm all that good), but I guess my advice would be to look at your definition of art a little more closely. From what you're saying I think you might be looking at your writing a little too much as a form of self-expression. Sure, it is that absolutely, but its not something that has to encapsulate all that you are and present that to people.
Another way to look at art that I kindof prefer because it takes some of the pressure off (and makes everything more fun) is to look at the whole process as a vicarious act of creation - whatever shots I take aren't so much a part of me or what I do as they are expressions that take on their own life and meaning, often in ways I could never have predicted and never intended.
To that end it sounds to me like what you want to express about yourself and the world around you might be changing a bit, and I think that naturally that means that your writing and the voice of your writing changes with it. If it were me, I'd try to experiment a little, play around and figure out what exactly it is that you care about and want to write about? What is it in the world around you that you find worth expressing, not so much perse what audience do you want to speak to, but what do you think is worth speaking about?
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